Obscene And Me

This is dedicated to someone who recently passed away. He was an acquaintance in the local music scene. He told me his secret, that he sees sex workers. He wanted to see me but he couldn’t afford it. If he had never told me that he saw sex workers, I would’ve just hung out with him and probably would have sex with him for free.

I feel terrible. Has this work made me value material items too much? Have I got lost in it all? I was lower middle class growing up and flat out poor from age 18-22. I feel like I have abandoned my true punk roots.

Your ghost interrupts my dreams

you haunt every part of my being

Paralytic desire of a rumination

Come when you don’t make sense

The nuisance of the adjacent

Your secrets die with you

And I for one, will never tell

My secrets die with you,

And you for one

Will never tell

One thought on “Obscene And Me

  1. This is beautiful and poignant. We cannot separate ourselves of today from the path we have taken. We cannot know what tomorrow will bring. At any time, we make the best possible decision we can based on many things–knowledge, emotion, aspiration, fear…

    It is perfectly normal to worry that someone might wish to take advantage of what you do for a living. Have no regrets. You may have been able to explore things with one another outside of the bedroom that would have never been possible had he not known you were an SW. And perhaps those things were as fulfilling to him. as anything that might have happened.

    Liked by 1 person

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